Author George R.R. Martin revealed a slew of character deaths including the Sony PlayStation Vita while reading a new chapter from The Winds of Winter to diehard fans attending an event in Portland last Friday. Winter is the sixth and most highly anticipated book of Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire series to date, and this chapter is the third so far released to the rabid public.
Despite having promised earlier in his promotions for Winter that no new POV characters would be added to his already expansive list, the audience was shocked when Martin read the title of the chapter as “PS Vita”.
“It doesn’t even sound medieval-y,” exclaimed Duncan Smith, webmaster of HotPieforPresident.com, before being carried away by a mysterious group of guards dressed in white.
To date, the Vita has never appeared in any of Martin’s books before. Described as having a wide face and stoic disposition by the acclaimed author, fans immediately took to this new character as a possible contender for the Iron Throne with its backwards compatibility and 0.3MP rear camera. When some of those in attendance began to voice concerns that the Vita might be too good to be true, others assured them that Martin does not kill any characters during the chapters written from their third-person limited point of view.
No time was wasted before the poor-selling handheld met the fate of many Martin characters before it, having its joysticks slashed, screen repeatedly crushed and buttons burned off during what the aptly named Jet Black Wedding. It was not until the bumpers were chewed away by the great feline knight Ser Pounce that Martin closed the book and ended the chapter preview.
“I hope you all enjoyed what you heard and plan to purchase the book when it comes out,” the author calmly said to an audience still stunned by the handheld console’s sudden and violent death. He also went on to explain that he did what had to be done, stating, “If Sony doesn’t have the balls to finally kill that useless thing then I’ll do it.”
At press time fans still have not coped well with the death, many of them calling for Martin to change the chapter or remove it entirely, pleading with him that the system is great for PS4 off-screen play, RPGs, and high-quality indie games. In a Facebook post shortly after the outcry from readers began pouring in, Martin explained his reasoning as “But is the screen big enough for FTL? No? Then fuck it,” and promised the chapter would be updated with an even more gruesome death as well as include the death of another Stark character as a means of making fans pay for their insolence.
To date, the Vita has never appeared in any of Martin’s books before. Described as having a wide face and stoic disposition by the acclaimed author, fans immediately took to this new character as a possible contender for the Iron Throne with its backwards compatibility and 0.3MP rear camera. When some of those in attendance began to voice concerns that the Vita might be too good to be true, others assured them that Martin does not kill any characters during the chapters written from their third-person limited point of view.
No time was wasted before the poor-selling handheld met the fate of many Martin characters before it, having its joysticks slashed, screen repeatedly crushed and buttons burned off during what the aptly named Jet Black Wedding. It was not until the bumpers were chewed away by the great feline knight Ser Pounce that Martin closed the book and ended the chapter preview.
“I hope you all enjoyed what you heard and plan to purchase the book when it comes out,” the author calmly said to an audience still stunned by the handheld console’s sudden and violent death. He also went on to explain that he did what had to be done, stating, “If Sony doesn’t have the balls to finally kill that useless thing then I’ll do it.”
At press time fans still have not coped well with the death, many of them calling for Martin to change the chapter or remove it entirely, pleading with him that the system is great for PS4 off-screen play, RPGs, and high-quality indie games. In a Facebook post shortly after the outcry from readers began pouring in, Martin explained his reasoning as “But is the screen big enough for FTL? No? Then fuck it,” and promised the chapter would be updated with an even more gruesome death as well as include the death of another Stark character as a means of making fans pay for their insolence.
No comments:
Post a Comment